Well! How exciting.

I just (twenty minutes ago) had someone trying to climb over the fence into the house, looming in at me through the kitchen window as he started to climb over. And when I waved at him he jumped back down so I went outside for a little chat with them, accompanied by Neil. Neil had heard one of them saying "I'm not going to do it", arguing with the other, five minutes before (Neil was smoking a fag in the dark in the garden) and he was coming out to check that they weren't breaking into the car. So I asked the one I saw jumping over the fence why he had done it BUT he was pretending to be on the phone (aah, classic) and the other one got mouthy to Neil. Then the first one got mouthy ("is this your road? I can walk along here if I like" etc etc) and loomed up to Neil, right in his face, with his hands in his pockets (not a good look, as Neil has been stabbed twice by people looming up to him, reaching their hands into their pockets). There was a girl on a bike as well but she didn't get mouthy.
At this point all other houses are being locked up tight as there's a FIGHT in the road (damn right there was, I was pretty grumpy at this point). So I phoned the police as they were threatening to "fuck up" Neil and to do all sorts of nasty things to the dogs. Then I got my camera and took some photos of them and one of them tried to grab the camera out of my hand but just sort of batted it. Thicko. The other apparently kept saying to Neil that he was a gipsy. Good on him. I think the point was that he shouldn't be messed with but HA.
Anyway, we went back inside and then they threw a bike over the wall into the garden. And then the police came and arrested one of them and said that the other wasn't a gipsy (why boast about a fake gipsy heritage?) and the dogs are sleeping on my bed tonight because I'm scared for them and I am all shaky and FULL OF ADRENALIN. Meep. I feel a bit sick. Plus I missed the results for the X Factor. How was your Saturday night?

Hectic time

Hi people, I'm sorry I haven't been posting anything recently or replying to your fabulous emails, but I've been having a total nightmare with the flat. The people who moved in prompty sealed the whole place up - no windows open, no ventilation, nothing - and then proceeded to cook masses of food, dry their laundry in the living room, take showers with the bathroom door open, and so on. In short, after ten days mould started to grow all over one wall and the doors started to swell and stick and the curtains started to go mouldy (really), and then after a MONTH the husband mentioned this to me as a sort of PS in an email when I said I was coming round to inspect the place. So I went round with Neil and there was mould all over my beautiful flat which they'd halfheartedly tried to wipe off, leaving brown smears everywhere, and pools of water on all the windowsills. And it was unbelievibly humid, like some sort of tropical slum. So Neil rang Environmental Health and they said it was definitely condensation, and we came back with a dehumidifier and explained to the wife that the windows need to be opened sometimes and that unfortunately as the damage was caused by the tenants they would have to pay for repainting the wall with antifungicidal paint. Then the husband phoned me that evening and stared yelling at me, so I passed the phone over to Neil and he said to Neil that "trust had been broken" and that it was our fault and that he was getting independent legal advice and that we were trying to rip him off and that he wanted to leave and that he wasn't paying and that we'd intimidated his wife and that we would hear from his solicitor. The whole thing is making me feel sick, even just writing about it. Thank god for Neil, he was so calming and reassuring. I don't want people ruining my beautiful home, it is a horrible feeling. I wrote to him offering to pay a third of the paint costs as a goodwill gesture but the whole thing is making me miserable and I have to go over again this evening to inspect the damage and I'm worried he will be unpleasant and aggressive again. So that's been my week. How are you guys?

The Miracle of Birth

And today I am showing three people round the flat

Because I'm going to rent it out. Oh, and I have been offered a job with www.gresham-books.co.uk.

And I don't know if I mentioned it but I went to France too

I know, I know

I've been rubbish. I'm so sorry Ems that I didn't get to see you before you went! I feel really bad... here are some photos of what I've been up to in the meantime: camping in Cornwall with Rachel!

Jung typology

I did this test:

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

and it says I am an INFJ!

http://typelogic.com/infj.html

Do you think this sounds like me?

I also did an IQ test and got 131, which I was talking to Jess about. We decided that as the median (mean? Average anyway.) is 100, there is an opposite of me out there somewhere with an IQ of 69, and this person is my nemesis. A really crap nemesis. "Quickly, distract her with a handful of shiny pebbles! Aha! Now to put in place my plan for world domination! Nothing will stop me now! Stop throwing pebbles at me, nemesis, that really hurts."

What do you think?

Perfect weather, good food, delicious aperitifs...

I had a wonderful time in Venice

I call this one "The Blood! The Blood!"

A nice, quiet, restrained evening to celebrate Emily's homecoming... guess which one is my favourite?

In response to popular demand...

My fave five from a fun-packed week: The Holocaust memorial, a tank next to the Soviet war memorial, the view from our window, a mural showing the glories of the socialist cccp (ie Russian) space programme, and a statue celebrating the great authors of Germany. In the same square where the Nazi book burnings happened. Like I said, a thought-provoking week.

Do you miss Oxford?

We miss you! Looking forward to mid-May. Photos taken early evening just before going to the Turf with Lilly for a pint.

I done painted me a picture for my momma

This seems to be turning into a picture blog... but I had to post these pics. How gorgeous?

It is Neil's 40th today

Happy birthday Neil!

Just a few more...

Would you like to see my holiday photos?

I won't bore you with all of them, but here is a selection:

This news just in.

I might be moving house in June. More on that story later.

Well, it's done.

I have spent two days moving large items of furniture out of Stanton St John and into a van and then out of a van and into the Bakehouse. My muscles are aching and I could hardly cycle to work this morning. But all the main bits of furniture are now out of the house and I've said goodbye to it because it's being sold early next week and I'm going to be in Rome then. There were six of us moving everything - me, Neil, Rachel, Hal, Daddy and his new girlfriend Carole. Who is a tiny bit of boho chic hippy floaty French stuff who can't heave up one end of a wardrobe and manouvere it round a spiral staircase (over the handrail, brace, turn it through 180 degrees, hold it steady, watch out for the stairlift, down slowly, etc,) to save her life. She did try, bless her, but she wasn't much use, and she nearly broke her wrist. And Daddy was in a foul temper of course because it was a bit depressing, and by the end of the day she was not very happy. So that was an added complication. But it's done now and I'm off to Rome on Thursday! I am going to buy a hot pink suitcase today.

Lilly

Interested?

Shopping

I went shopping yesterday lunchtime at the fag-end of the January sales. Everything is so cheap! I bought a black top, three quarter length, buttons on the sleeves. And some boots, knee high, brown leather, small heel. And a jacket, brown, tailored, waist-length. And a pair of black leather gloves. And some makeup (face powder). And an ankle length brown cordouroy skirt. And some octopus.

Why, yes, actually. I did have a little haircut.

How kind of you to notice!